We experience misery, when our activities, relationships or thoughts are out of alignment with our higher selves and drain us of our precious energy. We are able to remain stable (i.e. function) by plugging holes and stopping the energy drains. More specifically, we slowly, subtly (and often outside of our awareness) facilitate avoidance or numbing of our miserable state with things like food, sex, drugs, work, or reality tv shows.
In addition, we often view change in terms of all-the-way or no way. Instead, start with a small step towards a potential change to determine if it’s really for you. For example, if you want to leave your job and start a bakery business, begin by researching and making a list of requirements (e.g. financial, time). Wake up early, bake for your co-workers and ask for feedback.
Take a moment to ask yourself:
What is the absolute worst thing that can happen if I make this change?
On a scale from 1-10, what is the likelihood that this “worst thing” will actually happen?
Can I do things beforehand to protect myself from this or other potentially unwanted consequences?
Lastly, share your concerns with someone you trust. Having someone mirror our fears back to us can illuminate their improbability or help us find ways to minimize the feared outcome.
I am the perfect person to be in this perfect place at this perfect time for a perfect purpose.
I am open to learning a perfect lesson in this perfect moment.
Approach your experiences, with curiosity, openness and self-compassion and watch “failures” transform into lessons and opportunities.
No version of our potential future is certain but our current circumstances can be a good predictor. If you are mentally, emotionally, and spiritually unfulfilled today, and do nothing to change that, you will likely feel that way tomorrow. Consider your end game and choose to make small shifts to bring you closer to your desired outcome, purpose or vision.
Stable misery tricks us into believing that the puddle is as fulfilling as the sea. We no longer strive for the sea and sometimes forget it even exists. By seeking freedom from stable misery, we can once again see our lives as the seas of possibilities they are!
What other beliefs can hold us in stable misery?
Have you ever been in stable misery? How did you cope?
Are you in stable misery in one or more areas of your life? What is one small change you can make today to advance towards your sea of possibilities?
Comment below, I'd love to hear from you!